How offended are you?

We've all encountered those moments when someone's words or actions rub us the wrong way, triggering a cascade of emotions. But why do some people seem continually offended while others remain cool as a cucumber? 

The answer lies in two words; unhealed and healed.

An unhealed person cannot see past hurts and unresolved traumas.

A healed person, on the other hand, understands that other people's actions are often a reflection of their own inner conflict, not an attack or reflection on them.

 Here are a few reasons why an unhealed individual might find offense in almost anything:

Personal Insecurities: Unresolved insecurities can make a person overly sensitive to perceived slights. A casual comment can feel like a direct attack, intensifying feelings of inadequacy or worthlessness.

Protection: Unhealed individuals often project their own unresolved emotions onto others. If they struggle with feelings of anger, they might assume others are angry at them, even when there's no evidence to support this.

Hyper-Vigilance: Past traumas can lead to a state of constant alertness, where the person is always on the lookout for threats. This hyper-vigilance makes them prone to overreacting to benign situations.

Lack of Boundaries: Without healthy emotional boundaries, an unhealed person may take everything personally. They might struggle to separate their own feelings and experiences from those of others.

Here are ways a healed individual maintains a state of peace with their perspectives:

Self-Awareness: Healed individuals are aware of their own triggers and emotions. This self-awareness helps them to respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively.

Empathy: By recognizing that everyone has their own struggles and pain, a healed person can extend empathy rather than judgment. They understand that hurt people hurt people, and often it's not personal.

Healthy Boundaries: They establish and maintain healthy boundaries, recognizing what belongs to them and what doesn't. This helps them to not take responsibility for other people's emotional baggage.

Perspective: Healed individuals have a broader perspective on life. They understand that not everything is about them and that people’s actions are often driven by their own issues and not by malice.

Which of these did you find you most related with?

If the answer is the unhealed person….. we invite you right now, make time to turn from unhealed to healed, here are a few steps to start the process:

Seek Professional guidance: This can help uncover and address deep-seated issues. Moving you from where you are into a brighter joy filled future.

Practice Mindfulness: Mindfulness techniques can foster greater self-awareness and emotional regulation.

Cultivate Empathy: Making an effort to understand others' perspectives can reduce feelings of personal offense.

Develop Healthy Habits: Engage in activities that promote mental and emotional well-being, such as exercise, journaling, prayer and meditation.

Did I mention prayer?  Just 12 minutes of personal reflection and prayer each day makes a tremendous impact in our brain. It is said to strengthen a unique neural circuit that specifically enhances our social awareness, empathy AND helps us love our neighbor! We will develop a heightened sense of compassion and our negative emotions will be subdued.

So whether we find offense in the actions of others or understand them as reflections of their own personal struggles often depends on our own state of healing. By focusing on our healing journey, we can navigate life's hills and valleys with grace and empathy.

Until next time, stay Anchored in Love & Guided by King!

 Perfectly Imperfect,

Sam